Well, I’m camped out in the most sincere pumpkin patch I could find with a bottle of whiskey and a trick-or-treat bag full of rocks, and I’m just certain that this is the year I’m finally going to get a visit from the Great Pumpkin.
Each year the Great Pumpkin rises out of the pumpkin patch that he thinks is the most sincere. He’s got to pick this one– he’s got to! I don’t see how a pumpkin patch can be more sincere than this one. You can look all around, and there’s not a sign of hypocrisy– nothing but sincerity as far as the eye can see.
Attaboy, Linus– don’t stop believin’.
Happy Halloween, y’all.